The 11 wackiest TV merchandise items on the internet
So Christmas is over and we’re all a little fatigued with the New Year sales. That hasn’t stopped us from trawling the internet for some truly weird and wonderful TV-themed merchandise, though! We live for cluttering our homes and offices with all the TV-related gewgaws and gubbins we can get our grabby hands on, and in case you do too, allow us to save you the long hours of research by presenting the top 11 wackiest TV merchandise items on the internet:
Dunder Mifflin copy paper from The Office U.S.
Ever thought your office is pretty much exactly the same as the Dunder Mifflin Scranton office, with all its idiosyncratic team members? Well now you can make your working life even more like that of Michael, Dwight, Jim, Pam & co., by purchasing either cartons or reams (500 sheets per ream, 10 reams per carton) of Dunder Mifflin brand copy paper in bright white, which works well in copiers, inkjet or laser printers.
Official True Blood shower gel and shampoo
We could never describe these very tenuously themed shower products as tantalisingly as the good people behind HBO’s merchandising. Here’s how they describe the ‘Forsaken’ range and its ‘bouquet’:
“A fragrance that flirts with the dark side … a new scent story that opens with the ripe temptation of Dark Blackberry, Anjou Pear and Blood Orange. It lures you in as it then blooms with a carnal blend of uncompromising sensuality and the complexity of the Night Blooming Jasmine, Sheer Violet, and Black Plum. It closes with the mysterious finish of Ebony Wood, Amber Crystals, Patchouli and Vanilla. Vie for this bouquet … It’s deliciously haunting, leaving you powerless to its charm. Forsake all others — for this one is all you need.”
Parks and Recreation bacon scented candle
Ever wanted to wake up to the smell of bacon, even on those mornings when you don’t have the time or supplies to cook it? Want to be reminded of that beautiful smoky aroma at all times? Well look no further, as the folks at NBC have got your cravings covered with this bacon scented candle. Perfect for torturing your vegetarian housemate with – as Ron Swanson would have intended.
Saturday Night Live ‘Dick in a Box’ salt and pepper shakers
A somewhat more ‘savoury’ version of the original ‘Dick in a Box’ gag, these salt and pepper shakers are made of ceramic and measure 2 1/2-inches tall x 2-inches wide x 2-inches long… Who said size matters? These little beauties even include that all-important hole in the side. You know what to fill it with…
Which saints among us haven’t been tempted to stuff a hotel bathrobe into our suitcase? Yeah yeah, we know you’re lying… Anyway, with Mothers’ Day around the corner, why not treat that special life-giving lady with this Oedipal tribute based on Norman and Norma’s Bates Motel? Or just freak out any visiting houseguests who might be using your bathroom by revealing your inner psycho!
Coronation Street‘s Steve and Michelle travel mug
Why anyone would need or want this this travel mug is beyond us, but if you’re crazy about those cobbles, it could be the perfect portable drinks container for you! Printed with Coronation Street‘s iconic brickwork and logo on double wall insulated plastic. Very swish indeed.
6 bottles of Duff Beer from The Simpsons
Okay so everybody already knows about this one, but it’s too good not to include. Whether you’re drinking alone while laughing along to the exploits of Homer, Marge, Bart and Lisa, or hosting a party that’s Simpsons-themed or otherwise, pop a case of these babies on ice and be the most popular person in the room.
Archer plush doll
More creepy than wacky, this Archer doll will certainly scar your children for life, but that’s totally okay! At least it’s not as haunting as the Baby Seamus plush, which is also available to purchase for those particularly sadistic parents. You can thank us when you’re older, kids!
Jax’s reaper tattoo from Sons of Anarchy
For those of you not committed enough to get this badass tattoo for real, FX has devised these brilliant 11 x 11 inch temporary tattoos to give you that much-needed anarchist edge. Comes in a 2-pack; one for your chest and one for your back, maybe? We think so. Disclaimer: will not necessarily make you as hot as Charlie Hunnam. Sorry ’bout it!
Breaking Bad Heisenberg stress ball
Cracking under the pressure of running a secret drug empire? Or maybe you’re just stressed out about your next office presentation? Either way, this squishy little Heisenberg head is perfect for scrunching out some of that anxiety when you feel like breaking, so things don’t turn bad!
Literally none of the super stylish women on Girls would be caught dead in one of these hideous hoodies, which is what makes them all the more appealing to our contrarian sensibilities. They’re so awful it’s kind of beautiful.